Clubbing without the dancing

Book clubs have always been curious to me - you read an assigned book and get together to discuss it without there being a grade? I am now officially part of my first one and it is not at all what I had expected. I have to admit that I was picturing something like my senior AP English or college literature classes where we sat around and discussed literary elements and writing styles and even theses. I'm sort of glad it was not that rigid. In fact, the "club" itself seems only inspired by the books we read, and more driven by the passions of the women there. Our first book discussion was about Still Life with Rice. I think the story on the whole was well told and sparked in us experiences and reflections from our own lives. For those of us who are married, it spoke to us as mothers and wives who struggle to give our families the best and meld two families into one. As singles, it spoke to us as Korean American women caught between two cultures, who struggle and live in a man's world, dictated by men's notions and standards.

It's so hard being a woman. We are always underestimated, and our worth, as much as we resist, is so tied up in being accepted according to MAN-made standards. When we go to the workplace, we are taught to think and act like men in order to excel, and when we go home, we are expected to nurture and hold the house together like a piece of carefully woven fabric. We are strong, adaptable chameleons. I'm sad to say that when I first learned I was having girls, part of me felt a bit disappointed. I knew that I would be bringing two girls into this world who would face a host of discrimination and trials based solely on their gender. I can't say what it's like to be a man, but when I compare struggles with my husband, he agrees that being a man is easier. I AM glad that we gave birth to two girls. I have so many desires and aspirations for them. I want to teach them to fight the odds, stand firm to their beliefs and find their own voice. God endowed them with unique strengths, some of which include supportive roles, but some which may also include leadership functions. Women have more power today than ever before, because the ability to succeed as a member of the human race is no longer based on physical strength, but on our mental prowess. Sure, we will always have to prove our worth and speak louder to be heard, but we are making waves.

By the way, do men have book clubs, too? My husband is willing to start a movie club if there are any takers. It doesn't sound like much of a "club" in my opinion. Anyway, I'm excited to see how our book club will evolve and how much more we will learn from one another. It's just what I needed - to stimulate my brain cells and warm my senses with the company of like-minded sisters. We are women, hear us roar.