Happy Birthday Bro

My baby brother is now 25 years old. Happy Birthday AND congratulations on getting engaged AND on finally graduating - three big things to celebrate this year!

Here are some famous people with whom you share a birthday:

77 Berry Gordy Jr. - Motown Records founder, 70 Gary Hart - Former U.S. senator, D-Colo., 66 Bruce Channel - Singer-songwriter, 64 Paul Warfield - Football hall-of-famer, 63 Randy Newman - Singer-songwriter, 60 Joe Dante - Movie director, 57 Paul Shaffer - Bandleader (''Late Show With David Letterman''), 56 Ed Harris - Actor, 53 Michael Chertoff - Secretary of homeland security, 50 Kristine Arnold - Country singer (Sweethearts of the Rodeo), 47 Judd Nelson - Actor, 45 Alfonso Cuaron - Director (''Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban''), 44 Matt Cameron - Rock musician, 44 Jon Stewart - TV host (''The Daily Show''), 39 Anna Nicole Smith - TV personality, 38 Dawn Robinson - R&B singer, 28 Aimee Garcia - Actress (''George Lopez''), 27 Chamillionaire - Rapper, 18 Scarlett Pomers - Actress (''Reba'')

Who knew you shared so much in common with Anna Nicole Smith?

What if...

After much deliberation, Joe and I have decided to stop at 2 kids. I packed up clothes, toys and gear that the girls have outgrown and even got rid of some things, including our Pack N Play. This weekend I had a night out with the girls and some drinks. Yesterday I was feeling nausea. And now, I'm late. I got rid of baby stuff, had a night of drinking, have been feeling nauseous, and am late. What if... This is not looking good.

Highlights from home

Things that remind me to be thankful for what I have:

1. Painstakingly making peanut butter sandwiches shaped like hearts and lovingly packing them in your child's lunch box. Then being told by your child that she refuses to eat peanut butter and jelly. What child doesn't eat PB & J? Tough cookies, toots. You should be happy I'm not sending you to school with breaded chicken liver.
2. Finally making it to the end of another semester of classes and still loving what I'm doing. Tonight we have to present our final design for our projects. I'll let you know how it goes.
3. Getting my husband back after a long weekend apart. Not only was I happy that he had a good time with his friends in Vegas, I was also glad to see that he came back with the same amount of cash in his wallet as when he left.
4. Eating the most mouth-watering, sensual sushi at Katsuya last night (the raw sweet scallops were practically R-rated). Is it a sin to lust after sushi?
5. Witnessing my baby's first successful poo in the potty. [chorus sings: Hallelujah] And it was a big one. Am I glad that didn't wind up in her diaper for me to have to clean.

It's gonna be a good week. I can feel it already.

One womb, two woes

It sometimes amazes me how different my 2 girls are. Not only do they look so different (to me), their personalities couldn't be more opposite. For instance, Abby has a temper and can sometimes be impatient. Sarah is more slow to anger and although she is going through her terrible 2's, she diffuses fairly quickly. Abby is loud and bold (we know who she gets this from) and Sarah is mild and meek. Abby is outgoing and sociable, Sarah is suspicious and introverted. When Abby started school last year, she was so happy to go everyday that she barely even noticed or cared about us leaving when we dropped her off. She was like this from the first day. It amazes me how highly adaptable she is. Sarah on the other hand loved school the first week and then decided the second week that she no longer wanted to leave mommy's side anymore. For the past week or so, she has been crying and screaming when we go to drop her off (it's even worse when I'm the one leaving her). On the days she's not in school, I talk about school and prepare her for the next day she has to go. All of us, Abby included, have been hyping it up. Abby even helps me take Sarah to her classroom first, so she can see that Abby is being dropped off too. So, this morning I thought she would be better. I left ample time to allow her to adjust, and Abby helped me soothe her. She whined and fussed, and as soon as I left, she began to scream. And instead of going to her, I ran... away. As fast as I could. I did all I could to assure her that I would not leave her for long and that she would have fun, but really what more could I do? Feeling guilty, I popped my head back through the door about 5 minutes later to check back on her. Once I saw the teacher give me a wink, I knew that everything was fine. According to the teacher, within a few minutes after I left, she was playing with her friends and eating snacks. She was just putting up an act. There's one thing my girls do have in common, and that's shear drama.

Thoughts about schools

The discussion about public versus private schools is always going on in our home lately. Next year our little girl will be entering kindergarten. Interestingly, I have come from being a staunch proponent of the public school system, to a supporter of private school education, and then back to public again. From my observations, private schools generally contain children from 2 different family backgrounds: 1) those that highly value education and/or 2) those that have loads of disposable income. Public schools, on the other hand, contain a different mix: 1) those that value education as an opportunity to gain more than textbook knowledge or 2) those who don't want to be there, but don't have a choice. I want a school that contains children from both #1's, without the #2's. I am even considering becoming one of those moms that commutes almost an hour each way to send my child to school. Is this crazy? I mean, how different will the outcomes really be for my children if they attend the public school down the street, versus the prestigious (and highly academic) private school a bit farther off, versus the "ideal" school over the hills and through the traffic-filled woods? As I ponder this, I realize that our decision on where to send our child is influenced less by what the school teaches, and more by the type of peers my child will interact with. Children will all learn to read and write in their own time, but the values they pick up these formative years, those are hard to change. These values become a part of their thinking for the rest of their lives. Who I am, including my insecurities, my self-confidence, and my perception of myself in relation to the world was and is shaped by the people around me. So, to me, it makes sense to think this way. Am I thinking too much into this issue and am I trying too hard to control every unknown in my children's future? Maybe so. But this could be one of the most important decisions we make for our children, especially since, if we were to go the private school route, this could possibly be the school they attend until they leave for college. I am grateful that we have the option to send our children to private school (as long as we don't have any more unintended mishaps). The choices among the over 70 private schools in the area, however, range the whole spectrum - on one end you have the school that boasts of famous and highly esteemed alumni such as Paris Hilton, and on the other you have the earthy, "anthroposophic" school that emphasizes healthy play and artistic learning. Ultimately, I want my children to go to a school that values my child's education as a high priority and inspires them to reach their highest potential. Every parent wants the same, but how a school achieves these goals is what parents differ on the most.

Officially becoming an adult

I consider myself an adult because I have:

1. learned to set goals for myself and at least make a plan to achieve them.
2. more often tried to choose what's good for me over what I really want. And sometimes these choices have become more automatic.
3. had a relationship with someone of the opposite sex for more than a year and not killed him (yet).
4. planned a trip from start to finish and included all the essentials (I'm getting good at this one).
5. stopped getting carded by the grocery store checkout guy (even though it says they have to ask EVERYONE that looks under 36 or 37).
6. fallen out of MTV's target age group. All of a sudden in the past few years, MTV has become progressively more stupid to me.
7. developed a severe distrust and fear of teenagers.
8. made Costco my first place to shop. If Costco had a wedding registry when we were getting married, you know I'd be all over that.
9. stopped needing to get somewhere or do something ALL the time.
10. learned to savor the good things in life: such as time with those you love and time without those you love.
11. lost the desire to listen to loud music, drink excessively, and ride life-threatening roller coasters.
12. had a live baby come out of me (twice) and given all that is within me to raise them.
13. taught a child something useful.

And finally, I can now say that I've planned and executed 2 semi-formal dinner parties, one of which I planned the menu and prepared the food for as well. After 7 years of marriage, I pulled out flatware and dinnerware that I didn't think I'd ever see again. And all of a sudden I felt so different, as if all my childhood tea parties and pretend banquets had been preparing me for this moment. I know I'm already an adult, but suddenly I feel more official. I feel as if I've entered a new stage of adulthood... "formal (dinner party) adulthood."

Men are from Mars

Some of the ladies and I were talking about doing something for our husbands. Something nice. What do men want? When men think about presents for their wives, they automatically go to gadgets and electronics, things they themselves would appreciate. And when women try to find the perfect gift for their man, they think of things like massages at a spa and a nice dinner. I guess it's all part of our inability to put ourselves in the other sex's shoes. So, some of the ladies suggested a spa day for our men. What did the men come up with instead? A trip to the shooting range followed by a satisfying steak dinner. Could men and women be any more different?

Celebrity sighting

So we had our first sighting today - I mean that a random stranger recognized us while we were out and asked us if we were the couple on reDesign. It caught me off guard at first. I didn't know whether to feel embarrassed or proud. My friend Julie was there at the time and she got me thinking. She seems to think there are tons of other people out there that will recognize us, but not say anything. This thought has started to get me really self conscious. All of a sudden I see people staring at me and can't help but wonder what they're thinking and what they'll say behind our backs: "Oh snap. I saw that girl from last week's reDesign episode picking her nose." or "That guy from that show we saw is really obnoxious. He wouldn't even give us an autograph. Jerk." Will stardom change us? I hope not. Joe seems to think that it's not a big deal and that not many people really watch the show. Oh well, whatever the case, I guess I'm going to have to watch myself in public and not be so vulgar or lewd anymore.

Empty nest

I finally have the house to myself. No kids. No husband. Why? Because, starting today my youngest is in school 2 days a week. I debated about this decision for many long months. I wanted to keep her home as long as possible, but now I see the benefit of going out and making new friends, learning new things from skilled teachers, and having a daily routine (things that I couldn't give her). I fully intend to use my free time taking care of myself, doing classwork, being productive and just enjoying myself, in the hopes that this will all make me a better and happier mom. It doesn't get much better than this moment right now. I don't have the pressure of work, nor do I have the pressure of kids. Plus with Sarah halfway potty trained and Abby going into kindergarten next year, my work is almost done, right? Somehow I don't think I'm off the hook just yet, but I'm tasting the good life more and more each day, and it tastes mighty sweet.

Unfair

My bro just called me from TX and said that he's watching our reDesign episode on TV right now. And what's worse is that so is more than half of the US, not including us. We have to wait 3 more hours. This doesn't make any sense to me. This time zone thing has got to go. Those of you on Central and Eastern time, I hate you.

Girls need sisters

This weekend I got fed, and I mean in the physical, mental, spiritual and emotional sense. I just got back from a 3 day retreat with 20 ladies from our church. Sure I haven't pooped in 3 days and have averaged about 4-5 hours of sleep the last 3 nights, but how often do I get to take off from all my daily responsibilities and just enjoy the company of other women? Here's a picture from our "10-minute" hike. Fortunately, we all made it unscathed and finished with a breathtaking view of the gushing waterfall you see behind us.

We have a good group of sisters from all walks of life. We represent different careers, interests, stages of life and races. We each bring our own gifts and our own personality traits. When I think about this weekend, it reminded me of orientation week freshman year of college. We spent all hours of the day and night with each other, and in that time we learned more about one another, in a way that you can't do from just seeing each other on Sunday. That's why college friends are so special. When you've endured long talks at absurd hours of the night in your pajamas over bowls of ramen together, there's something magical that happens. Mmmm. I didn't grow up having sisters so it's always a blessing for me to get some time with ladies. Girls just need sisters.

It was also so satisfying to delve into the word and enjoy seminars led by one of the sisters from our church, who happens to be a gifted teacher and orator. We learned about our suffering and were reminded through Job and Christ's death on the cross that God truly does know and understand our suffering. And that our present suffering is also a blessing, something we endure and gladly give to the Lord we love. Amen for sisters and amen to a beautiful (yet exhausting) weekend retreat. I'm already excited for next year. I had such a good time that I didn't think too much about missing my girls. Does that make me a bad mom? But I was SO excited to see them for the first time in 3 days, and I got the biggest, tightest, warmest hugs from them, too. I was very proud of Joe for taking good care of the girls while I was gone and even handling a few extras, such as an early morning dentist's visit for the girls (first visit ever for both of them) and taking them downtown for a festival. Because I have Mr. Mom living with me, what do you say we consider making these retreats semi-annual, huh, ladies?

A toilet miracle

Late last night we had a breakthrough, a toilet miracle, you could say. Sarah came out of her bed and exclaimed that she wanted to go potty. I was highly doubtful. She has tried to come out of bed for any excuse under the sun (moon). This was probably just a ploy to not sleep. Plus, what toddler who doesn't even get peeing in the potty all of sudden catch themselves when they have an urge in the middle of the night. IMPOSSIBLE. So, not wanting to discourage her or send mixed messages, I reluctantly took her to the bathroom. But this time, something came out. PEE! I was freaking out. After we got her cleaned up after her big accomplishment, she quickly reminded me, "One jellybean, Mommy." That girl has every promise I've ever made to her etched in her brain. At first I was trying to convince her that the jelly bean was going to rot her teeth and that she would get her reward in the morning. But then I looked down at her sweet, disappointed face. She can play me like a violin. And I remembered the promise I made. No exceptions. So, I got out the jellybean and she went over to Dad to proudly tell him the good news. It's time to pull out the big girl underwear. My little girl's all growns up.

Honestly, I'm proud of Sarah and all, but inside I'm also dreading all the false alarms, rushed trips to awful public restrooms, and accidents. When I don't have to clean up another disgusting, poop-covered butt, THAT is when I'll be a free woman.

Potty training deja vu

It's been a year and half and I'm back on potty duty again. Needless to say, Patty Potty and I did not turn out to be the best of friends last time we worked together on a 6-month long project named Abby. We're back again, but this time with a new archrival: Sarah Super Soaker. Expecting that things would go more smoothly and more quickly the second time around (and also hoping that Sarah would just simply follow her sister's lead), I took a relaxed approach. With Sarah at 2 1/2 now and my growing intolerance of the morning trash drop, I've decided to get serious. I'm pulling out the big guns: stickers, jelly beans, chocolate, whatever it takes to motivate this girl. Even Abby gets an incentive if she can get her sister to go in the potty and not in her pants. Initially there was a lot of excitement over all the cool stickers and the large jar of jelly beans. The excitement has grown stale.

Last week I decided to get creative. A friend of mine told me how her son loves Cars the movie and how she made a race track with movable cars that moved forward 1 step each time he peed/had an accident. With each successful potty attempt, Lightning McQueen would advance along the racetrack, and with each accident, the opposing car would move ahead. I made a similar diagram, but modified it to Sarah's passion: Dora. If she goes pee in the potty, Dora gets to climb one step up the mountain. If she has an accident, Swiper moves up. If Dora makes it to the top of the tallest mountain before Swiper, she gets a prize. Sounds like a great concept, doesn't it? This is a great tool for a child who is interested in long-term goals, can deal with delayed gratification and is competitive. Anyone have any potty training techniques for children who can sit in poop and pee all day, have no concept of long-term goals and are not very competitive? If she ever does get motivated to pee, she will get stickers, jelly beans, big girl panties and the privilege of moving Dora (which I took great care in making) up the mountain. Open your eyes, girl! You're sitting on a goldmine! And Abby, she has now assumed the role of Swiper and revels in moving Swiper up the mountain every time Sarah wets her diaper.

Conquering Half Dome and El Capitan

Half Dome
Originally uploaded by hyuhan.

Well. Not quite. But we did conquer our first trip to beautiful, picturesque Yosemite National Park with the girls. And we did brave the steep hike to Vernal Falls. The girls even walked a large portion of the hike, which is rated "Moderately difficult." This is a major feat considering that the difficulty of those hikes in the books are not rated by preschoolers. We have two future mountaineers in the making. Yosemite is hands-down my favorite national park. I could not stop taking pictures and staring at the 360 degrees of beauty. Here are only a few highlights from our excursion.

I think my favorite moment from our 3 day trip was renting bikes and catching all the wildlife and scenery along the Yosemite valley with the girls in their little bike trailer. For Joe I think it was the thrill of being the fastest car in the park, twisting through the windy roads in a minivan (I'm sure it would have been more exhilarating in a Ferrari, but then, where would we put the kids?). For the girls, it was probably swimming at the hotel and sipping hot cocoa while watching Dora from our hotel room. It was truly a trip for the whole family to enjoy.

Update on airdate

We finally have confirmation on our airdates for our reDesign episode. It's been almost a year since we were first selected for the show and we'll finally get to see how it comes out on TV. Of course we already know how the room turns out. The room is fabulous, but I can't make any guarantees about our performance. So, for those of you who have been waiting and asking, the show will be airing 10/21 at 8PM ET/PT on HGTV.